On Trying To Master Love

To master anything - a musical instrument, a sport, running a business, etc - we're going to require a lot of essential qualities: learning, commitment, devotion to the task, resilience, patience, humility and passion. It must be a continuous effort and a journey of growth. We need to be disciplined in staying present and deeply engaged with the task, we need the ability to immerse ourselves in the activity, and the discernment to understand that progress is gradual and requires enduring setbacks or periods of slow improvement as part of the journey toward mastery.

Trying to master love and being the best beloved are no different – they both take all of those things, but they require understanding something else too. Just as we don't become happy by trying to be happy, or original by trying to be original, we don't master love by trying to master love. You know that what causes happiness is not trying to be happy, it is through cultivating a particular mindset, attitude, and way of being. Happiness should not be pursued as a destination, but as a by-product of seeking truth and goodness. When chased directly, it remains elusive, like someone who seeks wealth for its own sake never truly enjoys its value. True happiness emerges through noble pursuits like kindness, courage, and personal responsibility, not as an end in itself.

Similarly, the journey to mastering love (and being the best beloved) is not an attempt to try to master love, it is the attempt to master the qualities that prioritise, nurture and sustain love - such as truthfulness, trust, self-awareness, honesty, patience, empathy, generosity, kindness, vulnerability and respect. Like any art or discipline, love is a by-product of living with Divine intention, cultivating virtues that support its growth. We don't master love by trying to master it, but by fostering the qualities that enable love to grow and thrive. Love flourishes when we focus not on the intrinsic mastery, but on the process of becoming the kind of person capable of being a continual blessing for your beloved.